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places i've lived

by Bestfriend

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1.
You tried to be, but you were never cruel So I’ll give you a warning before the credits start to roll I think I’m an unremarkable exit Written down in the margins of your afterthoughts I think I’m what happens When all of the lights in your room go dark So you want everyone to love you You want everyone to love you Except for me You want everyone to love you To love you Like I do All this time I’ve tried to waste Running through the same damn place And staring down the tunnel with you Nothing you say is true ‘Cause you want everyone to love you You want everyone to love you Except for me
2.
In this crumbling state around us You're the only one I want to hold Think we can manage that today God knows we won't make it to when we're old The water's rushing in, wish I knew exactly what I want to say What I know is that I’d give anything to see you on the subway We're getting way too old to do this silly chasing game that we play I’d give the world to see and talk to you in a taxi heading to the plane In this crumbling state around us, you're the only one I want to hold I think we can manage that today God knows we won't make it to when we're old Let's both give it all up in a second Just to see each other standing on a train I think we've got a little less than a decade I know what they say, but it feels too late I’ll hold your head close to my chest You can listen to me breathing, slow and forced The world receding We couldn't make it to the moon Even if we wanted to I think that ship set sail long ago That's what everyone's been told So we'll grab a raft and paddle 'til our arms break In this crumbling state around us You're the only one I want to hold I think we can manage that today God knows we won't make it to when we're old Let's both give it all up in a second Just to see each other standing on a train I think we've got a little less than a decade I know what they say, but it feels too late Wake up the same every day Pulling the coat over your face Tell a man he's fine ‘cause He'll never run out of time Paddle til our arms break Paddle til our arms break In this crumbling state around us, you're the only one I want to hold I think we can manage that today God knows we won't make it to when we're old Let's both give it all up in a second Just to see each other standing on a train I think we've got a little less than a decade I know what they say, but it feels too late
3.
Woke up with your hair in my face Bright morning light streaming like a cascade You’re half asleep while you trace your fingers around my thigh Hannah, do you think we could stay a few more minutes? Hannah, I think you forgot to shut the blinds If I’d convinced you to stay in the city, would we have had a chance? New apartment south of Seattle We could pretend we know how to slow dance Around the boxes underneath the quiet glow of broken lampshades And you look to me and to the street Shake your head, take my hand, Hannah Hannah, you’d take me to the backyard Behind the Japanese maple tree Use your left hand to pull me closer Right hand on my cheek In the city, we’d sit on the fire escape Cheap wine, legs off the edge Your hand is resting on my knee Hardened eyes, you’re always on the fence (You’re always on the fence) If I’d convinced you to stay in the city, would we have had a chance? New apartment south of Seattle We could pretend we know how to slow dance Around the boxes underneath the quiet glow of broken lampshades And you look to me and to the street Shake your head, take my hand, Hannah So Hannah took me to San Francisco Where she showed me Pacific Heights “Bet you couldn’t race me across the street,” she said Blinking through the flashing lights I wrote a letter under a different name, it got lost in the mail Now every word sounds the same And every day just feels stale (If I’d convinced you to stay in the city, would we have had a chance?) If I’d convinced you to stay in the city, do you think you’d just resent The new apartment south of Seattle While we pretend we know how to slow dance Around the boxes underneath the quiet glow of broken lampshades And you look to me and to the street Shake your head, take my hand Hannah
4.
Sorry, just didn't think I would stay late It's okay, cause we're all too scared to say anything anyway I’m trying to give less of a shit Cause everyone's got a handle on their emotional fits It's the middle of the night and I’m running around Classic people-pleaser wearing the crown Center of attention, middle of the crowd Don't know how I got here, or how to get out Just wanna stand outside, hiding out in plain sight Maybe I just drank too much Or maybe I need to catch the very last bus We're all going crazy but the story's just started And now there's no getting out Phone's lost and I’ve got a dead body smile, yeah, I don't know where I am Think I can get away with it for awhile Before the night has run out You've gone and met someone else tonight anyway There goes my whole point Of shitty beers and too many people around me talking About their highlight reels So he wants her back, it's an over-told tale She's on the fence, she doesn't know how she feels He's on his knees and he's making a fuss While I’m really just trying to catch the last bus Ben's leaving the party but he'll get a DUI Riley's getting a cab, but she'll probably cry We're all being nudged at the edge of a cliff And throwing bottles at the wall until something sticks Phone's lost and I’ve got a dead body smile, yeah Phone's lost and I’ve got a dead body smile, yeah Nobody here knows what they're looking for You get the feeling you should maybe just go It's like we're nineteen, party queens in a fistfight Never gonna die But we're never gonna feel right Maybe I just didn't get enough Familiarity's a hell of a drug Phone's lost and I’ve got a dead body smile, yeah I don't know where I am Think I can get away with it for awhile Before the night has run out You've gone and met someone else tonight anyway There goes my whole point Of shitty beers and too many people around me talking About their highlight reels It keeps coming and coming in waves It keeps coming and coming in waves It keeps coming and coming in waves It keeps coming and coming waves All of my friends All of my friends have gone home
5.
Hop the fence around the house Even though the exit's right over there But you're not paying any attention to me I’m a dull thorn in your side You say you'll walk me home tonight But you won't stay any longer than an hour You're talking to yourself as we walk along the path And I don't think my head is quite intact (But I say) Don't let the morning bring us down ‘Cause I like having you around I write so you can read it all Under the vague excuse of a diary As you brush your hair to the side and ask me how I’m doing Share a smoke or two or three Keep a lighter in my pocket just for you Reading books that I don't even like Just to quote them out of the blue Don't let the morning bring us down ‘Cause I like having you around You stop outside my door and say, “It's getting late, I should go home" While I look at my watch that doesn't work and say, “That sounds good" You hug me, say "goodnight" And you leave without a fight And you don't look over your shoulder Like a cool guy And I stand there and wonder What songs you'll listen to tonight As you walk home past the streetlights Don't let the morning bring us down ‘Cause I like having you around Don't let the morning bring us down ‘Cause I like having you around You sent a text that night Asking if I got inside alright I say “Of course i did, my door was a foot away" So you call and say “Hello, I just wanted to say I hope you sleep tight" And I say “Hey Thanks. You too."
6.
Will you walk me Through the cracks in our pavement? In the summer where we made it? We'll get married on your terrace And now I see you Fixing your new lover's hair Turn the light off in the bathroom we shared Dream of a flight with you Well we won't We won't be here for a while Hold my hand in the meantime We'll go out in style Maneuver the roots in the dirt Follow your feet in the dark I’ll kiss your fingers in the car We'll go out in style Been a few years now Do you think that I still look the same? You wear color now And I don't hang my head in shame I’ll take a picture (Go to the places we've never been) Take a picture of you and me (Cut out my face 'cause I’m wearing thin) In the place we found under the trees (Forget what you sound like against my skin) Bury it all and say a eulogy Well we won't, we won't be here for a while Hold my hand in the meantime, we'll go out in style Maneuver the roots in the dirt Follow your feet in the dark I’ll kiss your fingers in the car We'll go out in style Well we won't We won't be here for a while (good to see you) Hold my hand in the meantime (good to see you) We'll go out in style (good to see you) Maneuver the roots in the dirt Follow your feet in the dark I’ll kiss your fingers in the car We'll go out in style

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released October 21, 2021

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Bestfriend Toronto, Ontario

recently started watching malcolm in the middle for the first time and really enjoying it. hal's a stud

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